A strange year

Thinking back over 2009, I've found it to have been a rather odd year. I wouldn't call it a great year, nor was it horrible.

I speak personally, not broadly or globally, by the way. Why I have been blessed not to have been directly negatively affected by the miserable economy, something of a malaise has seemingly set in, especially here in Michigan. Even though things have been mostly good in my personal life, it's been hard to ignore the shared social dysthymia. The negativity seems to rub off to some degree. There's a good in that. I've been able to remain thankful for the blessings I have by the constant reminder that people around me have things much worse.

One celebrity death really bothered me. Mark "The Bird" Fidrych passed away back in April. I can count on one hand the celebrity deaths that have really shook me and affected me deeply. For whatever reason, his was one. It was a low point in the year.

Our family has had numerous personal challenges. But we've enjoyed some triumphs as well. Those, perhaps, are too personal to share in detail. Ultimately I believe those things have drawn me closer to my wife and daughter and certainly to God. At least it would seem that way.

An old friend of mine nearly died several times. Waiting for a friend -- the mother of young children -- to either get better or die is quite hard on the system. One does not even need to be particularly close to be jolted by something like that. Thankfully she appears to be making a full recovery and should be home with her family soon.

I tried as best as I could to unplug from the larger world this year. I don't really read the hard news, I don't watch TV, I don't follow domestic or international politics. I'm paying as little attention as possible to things like Michael Jackson's death and Tiger Woods' personal troubles. You could say that I've buried my head in the sand. I'd say that I've tried to reduce stress and give up fretting about things over which I have no control. That approach has been quite liberating.

2009 has been a year of seeking to know more about God. I think I started the year considering the possibility that either He does not exist or that He doesn't exist in the way or form which I have always understood him to exist. That feeling seemed to pass, helped along by reading about the conversion of a former world-renown atheist who is now a theist. By fall I had not only gotten past these little feelings of doubt, but I went hard the other way. I've been thirsting for knowledge about who God is, not as much in an experiential way but more in an intellectual way.

More to come... (maybe)

Swine Flu (?) hits home

It's possible my daughter has contracted H1N1. She's miserable and it is believed that the friend she spent much of the weekend with caught it from her little brother. Nothing is confirmed, but supposedly Swine Flu is the only flu really being seen in the area.

I'm not worried about the long term affects. I'm sure once my daughter gets passed whatever she might have, she'll be fine. The "scary" part is waiting for whatever this is to cycle through the rest of us in the house. It will be complete chaos if our daughter is sick and my wife and I can't work. Or, perhaps, it would be completely chill with all three of us laying around, moaning and groaning, doing nothing.

We'll see.

Maybe it wasn't the fruitcake after all

I felt lousy after Christmas. I felt utterly poisoned (as I previously posted.) Given that overindulgence is pretty common during the holidays, I chalked up my gastric distress to that.

In the wee hours of New Years Eve, unfortunately, all that "poison" came rolling out...violently. I hate nausea and vomiting more than just about any discomfort I've ever had. It didn't stop there. I became delirious. I didn't know where I was. I thought my wife, who was in the next room, had left for Hawai'i. That was all she needed to know to force me to go to urgent care.

Care was urgently given there, at least after I got done throwing up in the hallway, leaving a nice mess for the custodial staff. Because of the delirium, urgent care sent me to the big hospital, to the ER. I won't bore you with the details, but I was there for over 6 hours, 90% of that spent out in the lobby watching crap like "The View." Ugh. But I digress...

I'm better now. But I'm not right. Something is still off. I assumed I got food poisoning from a restaurant I ate at on the 30th. Since my stomach is still sour and it was for days before my little trip to the hospital, I'm wondering if there's something else at work. Have I worried myself into an ulcer? Do I have some sort of gastrointestinal disease? Do I just eat like garbage and, therefore, feel like garbage? My eating habits are not the best but I don't know how I could be making myself feel this bad.

Perhaps a return to my family doctor is in order.

Deadly Sin No. 2: Gluttony

In the post-modern world, it seems that people really don't believe in sin. Certainly, things that many used to believe were sinful are acceptable behaviors today. To think of overeating, a very common practice in our culture, as sin is probably to some laughable.

Every year after Christmas, though, I know why the early (6th Century) Church identified "gluttony" (latin: gula) as a sin. I feel that "sin's" grip on my body. As wonderful as feasting can be, I feel poisoned after the holidays. Christmas is toxic.

Here's what I ate yesterday (sorry if this seems like too much information):

* Leftover Indian food for breakfast
* About a dozen shrimp
* 10-15 crackers, about 1/2 w/slices of cheese
* Some chips and salsa
* Small scoop of mashed potatoes with gravy
* Small salad
* 2 slices of ham
* Piece of cheesecake
* Some fruit salad
* 2 bottles of Guinness Draught
* 1 bottle of Modelo Especial
* Small glass of egg nog
* 1/2 bag of Smart Food (R) Popcorn
* Maybe 2 cookies
* 5 small cups of Diet Dr. Pepper
* 20 oz. (lousy) gas station coffee
* About 8-10 asparagus stalks

This doesn't include all the junk I ate on Christmas eve: potato chips; rhubarb pie; lasagna; more lousy coffee; pre-made garlic bread; Diet Coke. Yuck. Reading this makes me want to never eat again.

I want to cleanse this stuff from my body. I want all the sugar and fat and carbs and processed garbage out. Now!

I fully and completely understand the blame for how I feel lies with me. A little more discipline yesterday should have been exercised.

Sidelined by illness

A little over a week ago, I felt a twinge of burning in my throat. It is allergy season so I chalked it up as something I could manage with some Benadryl. Every year this happens and every year I assume I'm just allergic to something.

Unfortunately, this has turned into a full-blown infection of some kind. Maybe it's just a generic upper respiratory infection. Maybe it's a sinus infection. Maybe it's strep throat. All I know is that it has made it very hard to function at home and at work. It has kept me out of the gym and from blogging.

I love this time of year. September is fantastic. For whatever reason, I can't seem to manage to get through it feeling healthy.

Hopefully the doctor will get me on something that will turn this around in quick order.